You can scroll down to see the signs, and then click for the printable version. Print the page using the print function on your browser. You will have a 8 and 1/2 by eleven inch sign that you can slip into an acrylic stand or tape up.
What you see on your screen is not what the sign will look like. But when you go to print, you will get a print preview that will show you exactly what the sign will look like. You can always cancel the print if you do not like it.
To return to this page press the back button on your browser, there are no links on the printable pages.
Loud talking or other noise in the library attracts vampires.
If you have garlic or a religious object this may protect you, but it is a violation of most religions to attract vampires simply to watch them consume your unprotected friends.
So, please respect others and use the library quietly.
Happy Halloween
Click for printable version of aboveThe full moon causes werewolves to turn into wolves, eat people, and, what most people don't know, return long over due library books.
Don't let long over due library books attract werewolves to your house.
Return library materials promptly.
Happy Halloween
Click for printable version of aboveEating in the library attracts cockroaches, zombies, and worst of all zombie cockroaches!
They breed like crazy, and how do you kill something that is not alive!
So, please no food or drink in the Library.
Happy Halloween
Click for printable version of aboveMummies are angered by the violation of their tombs and, strangely, the mistreatment of library materials.
Don't anger the mummies.
Treat library books and other media gently.
Happy Halloween
Click for printable version of aboveAngry librarians are more dangerous than vampires, zombies, werewolves and mummies combined.
This is because while angry librarians are rare they do exist.
So please enjoy the library properly.
Happy Halloween
Click for printable version of above
You can use pastel paper to make the sign more festive, this can help the patrons understand that it is all in good fun.
These signs are to some degree based on my successful and popular work as a substitute public high school yard supervisor and teacher. I try to remind students to behave in ways that they find amusing. It helps and is basically costless. If you are amusing then you can remind people of the rules without nagging. However, it is not intended to solve all problems, or deal with particularly acute or difficult problems.
As my suggestions are based on my experience with teens these might be particularly good for the teen or young adult section of the library. If they work there you could cautiously expand to other sections of the library.
The signs were used in the young adult/teen section of my public library. I do not know if they helped, but I have not heard that there were any complaints.
The Department of Homeland Security issued directions on how to survive a zombie apocalypse about the time I originally posted this page. They suggested that people prepare for a zombie apocalypse by stocking up on the same things that they suggested for other natural disasters. An interesting coincidence that they are followed the same strategy as this web page. No doubt they got the idea from me, but it is surprising how fast they finished the project. It is also surprising that they found the page given how few hits it had received. Perhaps, it is just a matter of good minds thinking alike.
The Internet can be used to gather the ideas of many people for a project like this. With a lot of librarians and patrons thinking up ideas we could have plenty of high quality whimsical signs even if we switched signs frequently. Once again this would give us an opportunity to teach and remind people of good library behavior without nagging.
Is there a behavior problem that you would like me to address? Do you have a question or suggestion? Perhaps you have an idea for a sign that you want to add to my collection. Make a public or private comment here.